Sunday, April 17, 2011

This place's about to blow.

You'd tell me if I looked ridiculous in cosplay, right? Please tell me if  I can't pull it off, I don't want to walk around and look stupid. I just want to be hardcore and intense and legit. But right now I don't feel like any of it... I guess I've been secretly depressed. I'm constantly thinking/battling/hating my weight. Always and I know that's not healthy.

I know loosing weight won't solve all the problems in the world, but I just want to feel pretty on the outside. Sometimes I just feel so heavy and weighted to the ground. I get very short breathed fast and I want to change that. I'm doing it for myself, I want to be better.

*raises right hand*

I will give up:
1. Soda. Yep no regular soda and no diet soda of any kind. It's filled with chemicals and I need to drink more water anyway.
2. Sugars. No candy, ice cream, cookies, nada. I need to replace these items with fruits, natural sugars.
3. No crackers, chips, or bleached/enriched wheat.

If me or Cheryl violate our diets, we have to eat 10/12 donuts as punishment. Yuck. And I'm totally upping my exercise. 8  more weeks till A-Kon, let's do our best! >.<

1 comment:

  1. Awwww Mattie.... dont be depressed about your weight. :( and I mean I know thats easier said than done. But girl you are so gorgeous! and you've already lost so much weight! Im really proud of you! and thats great you want to loose weight for yourself, thats a great mind set to be in. ^_^ Your going to get there I promise! and I also promise I'll always be honest with you if I think you could pull of a cosplay or not. As I hope you and Meghan will do the same for me as well. >< Cosplay is great, but its also seeming to put a lot of stress on you and meghan about weight, and bringing you down. :( and thats not good at all. I wish I could show you and Meghan how I see you both; as absolutely beautiful strong women, whos beauty just glows. You two are so naturaly beautiful you dont even have to try! and I mean I totaly understand about the weight stuff. Almost every single girl wants ot be thin, Its like also pushed at us all the time by media and what not. @_@ but I just want you and meghan to know that you two are beautiful the weight you are now. And I mean thats great you two want to loose weight for yourself and feel healthier! thats wondeful! Just try and keep that your mind set, doing it for yourself and to be healthier, dont get down on yourself, always try to build and lift yourself up. Love you Mattie! I'm praying for you!