Tuesday, November 6, 2012
"I may know the anwser, though one question I still hear."
I always come to this song. It's beautiful, sad, calming.. beautiful. Inspiring!
Stressful things lately...
Just people here are starting to get on my nerves.. >.>
Then I hear stuff from the house:
- Brant wrecked the van meaning.. Mom and Dad have to pay to fix the van, pay to fix the other dude's car, and pay triple now on Brant's insurance because he got a ticket.
- Brant not taking care of the dog HE ran over.
- Brant not paying on his $16,000 school bill and since he lives with Mom and Dad it'll fall back on them... therefore they have to pay for.
- Mom is depressed because she can barely walk. Doctors are telling her there's no point in surgery because she's old.
- Rhiannon isn't really helping Mom out with the kids, just complains and stuff.
Mom wanted to get the kitchen up and running but she's had to dip into her repair funds and she's upset about Christmas, she won't be able to do much this year.
I don't want anything for Christmas. From anyone.
I just want to be home...
It's hard to see someone spend $700 on two pairs of boots when I know my parents are hurting... I wish someone had a "big boy" / "grow up" stick so I could beat the living crap out of my brother. Is it horrible of me to want to push him off a cliff? I wish he'd move out.
December come quick. I need a sad movie.. I need to cry.
I just don't know what to think... I've been doing horribly too.. I've been cursing a lot.. Just down in the dumps. I'm honestly sick of being here... but I'm gonna stick it out till December.
I need the peace of God.