Friday, November 30, 2012

Beware of r a n t i n g

I don't know what to say, my brain hurts. I have a lot to rant about.. /raiseseyebrows
But I don't feel like it? Buh.. but that video is super cute so you should watch it before I dive into my huge rant fest, that might take you a long time to read through.

Ready, set, GO!

- I guess when Rhiannon picked up Ambri from daycare P kind of jumped her about talking to me... like if she has spoken to me recently or not. I mean yes, I was talking to P and stuff.. about once a week. But geez, like I feel like I'm gonna get scolded or something. I mean I barely call my parents because I'm so exhausted at the end of the day.. I get my homework done and pass out. And I don't use my old phone, the battery died and I haven't recharged it... bet when I do plug it in I'll have a butt load of missed calls. But I know she's totally going to ask me about working Christmas break or working next Spring... I'm beginning to question relationships I have with other people, because I feel like I'm being used more often than not. 

- To stay or not to stay? I talked with my parents about it while I was there for Thanksgiving break, they said why not? That like four-ish months... the same amount of time I spent this past fall.. it went by pretty fast. And I'm getting paid.. that's more money for Nursing school. I just.. am torn.. and after a day like this *glares* it makes me question my sanity. Here's a rant within a rant:
            - this child is super whiny.. nap time is a time for people to regain sanity. It is essential. But when it's not there... one can tend to go off the deep end.
            - when you come home to your child, and your child wants you... don't nap on the couch and expect peace and quiet. Especially if your child is a whiny child..... >.>

These days are far between, but ohhhhhhhh. Like I can see the other side of child abuse. I'd never do it, that's not me and I love my babies.. but you know sometimes people can snap. Holy crap.

- Nursing school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Need I say more? I just wanna graduate already... if and when I get accepted in the fall 2013, it's two more years till I can graduate. Two more years till I can get a real job and move out. And finally grow up. D:

- I'm tired of my sister calling me and ranting about her life... her husband problems. I know that sounds a bit ironic, because I'm ranting right now.. and you guys are probably sick of hearing me rant, but it's like she never takes anyone's advice and some of it is her problem too. I.. I just don't wanna go into it.

- Brant, same as always, needs to grow up.


I feel like I have so much gray hair because of stress... and I eat cause I'm stressed. I know I do... when you're stressed you have that feeling, a weight, you feel like you're gonna fall off that cliff but you're right on the edge. So I try to fill that void with soda, and candy, and anything that tastes good. XP

I think I have decided to stay till next May. I mean it has many perks: great pay and they fly me back every month. I haven't told them yet... or anyone else. I think that's why P is gonna call me too, to see what's up working wise. I kind of have a pit in my stomach about that too... I know she wanted me to work during Christmas break.. but I'm just like ehh.... I told them I'd come back... but am I a horrible person for not wanting to? I probably will for the summer, just not a lot of hours... I can't do that again. I wanted to kill myself last summer. It was hell, seriously.

With that being said... I kind of want to go to Katsucon XP
And I've been thinking about re-doing Asami and Sophie for it... but who knows.

I haven't been thinking about working out or getting fit, but I'm going to... right now I just feel stressed with life and this stupid paper I have to write that I just wanna crawl in a hole, with sweatpants on, and hide from the world.


p.s. I totally know what I wanna do for my b-day / welcome home party >3

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