I walked with you once upon a dream.

I guess I've been kind stressed and down in the dumps and I haven't really figured out why..... until now, mwhahahaha. I have a big test in a couple of weeks. Siiiigh. Don't you hate it when you're upset and don't really know why.. like the problem is in the back of your mind and the next day your brain is like, Hey this is why you're upset stupid. Well that's what happened to me. You want to know how I need to fix it? Study my freaking butt off. Which I really am dreading... lol But I know it needs to be done, because I really really really want an A in this class. Evillll mircobiology, I will rule you!

I also think why I've been a bit down in the dumps is because I've gained some weight back. Ever since I got off that fast, it has been pretty bad, like keeping weight off. Plus eating all the sugar and stuff makes me pretty blah and less energetic. SO, I'm going back on it. Yes, it might be pretty strict, but that's what I need. Something strict to keep me on the path. I mean not only to I want to look good for cosplay, but I want to be happy with myself!

And I got to thinking... Disney World is the ultimate place for cosplayers. They get paid to dress up like characters! Ahhh, what an amazing job that would be. I love Disney World, I went a long time ago.. I think it was 2000 or so.. I can't really remember. But I want to go again! I actually think it would be awesome to get married there, haha, because it's magical there. And you can totally stay the night in Cinderella's castle now! They turned it into a hotel! GASP! I so wanna go there! ROFL I'm a girlie girl, what can I say? I would love to get paid to walk around dressed up like a princess and make kids dreams come true! How fun would that be? Seriously mannn.

 "I was beginning to think that wishin' on stars was for babies and CRAZY people."

 Isn't this a good Tinker Bell? I think she's adorable.

Black Swan

To start out with, the whole story of Swan Lake is very depressing. You know, the ballet? So just add the drama of putting on a ballet with eating disorder ballerinas, and you have the movie. More or less. There were some scenes that were rather distasteful and awkward to sit through.. but you know it was a pretty good movie. It totally kept me guessing and I didn't expect the end. So... would I see it again, probably. Haha, this is the first rated R movie I've seen in theaters.

Of course the soundtrack was amazing. Swan Lake + Tchaikovsky = pure awesomenessss. But I really liked Clint Mansell's take on it and even when it was just music during some random scene it still had a Swan Lake echo in it. I just got done downloading the soundtrack, uhhh, it's so creepy but beautiful all at the same time.

Yes, you're probably asking, "Wasn't there some lesbian themes in it?" Well yes and no? I won't spoil anything if you want to see the movie, but there definitely were some girl and girl stuff going on which was what I totally didn't care for. That and they really dropped the "f" bomb a lot. But it was really suspense full and thriller like. It really showed you what professional ballerinas go through, which is really rough and crazy life style. Natalie Portman, who played Nina, worked out 8 hours a day and only ate carrots & almonds for her role. She starved herself to fit the ballerina mold and afterwards she said she hated it and didn't know how girls did it. Crazy!

KAWAII

I've been watching a count down of the "blingest bashes" of My Super Sweet 16. Yeah I know what you're thinking, wow. But there seriously is nothing else on, duhh. Haha, it was this or Jersey Shore so I had slim pickins. It's crazy how much money they spend on a party.. like $300,000 or more. Insane. I don't know what I would do with all that money, most definitely not spend it on one night. Boo.

I want to see Black Swan but the more I've researched it... the more I don't. Like there are a ton of sexual themes in it and other crazy stuff. So I don't know... I might just wait till it comes on dvd and rent it or something. I mean, if you've seen the trailers you pretty much know what I mean.

Today at the daycare we're having our Valentine's Day party, yay! I made Avatar and lolita cards for all my kids! It was so much fun. And I'm loading them up with candy for the weekend! Haha.

Siiiigh, I'm just having a lazy Friday. I'm glad it's pretty nice out and not rainy like I thought it was suppose to be. I know it's suppose to rain soon, I just hope it doesn't freeze or turn into snow. I think I got some sun yesterday! lol

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.

Ahhh, it's days like these that are amazing. I'm just so happy and full of energy :3 I love this weather! I could just stay outside in this forever. Not too cold not too hot! I love it. I would love to just be able to take a nap outside.

Happy Valentine's Day (late) if I didn't tell you already. I hope your day was fantastic and filled with many joyous things that you will remember forever! I had an amazing Valentine's Day, I got to share it with my friends and family. People who I love and they truly care about me. And that's what it's all about. Love and loving on others.

Something I've been kind of struggling with is just hating on myself. I've been praying about it but sometimes it's hard. I guess it's hard to explain too... but you might be going through the same things or have gone through these things. I just want to be happy and feel good, you know? But I think it's time that I start asking help from my Father.

I hope you guys have a wonderful day and I hope that you get to enjoy it! I'm so exited because we're going to be blessed with this weather this whole week! I love the sun. Dude, I can't wait until the summer! Mmmmm vitamin D.